Slept pretty late last night cos was yakking on the phone. Woke up in the morning feeling abit like I was on my way to being a tofu. 6am morning prayer was spent catching up with my sis. Yes, I should have concentrated. I am sorry.
Some things that have been running through my mind...
(a) Is having money really all that important? I mean is living a life of luxury really something I want?
(b) Is risking again ever going to happen for me again? What is wrong with me sometimes I don't understand.
(c) Is my back going to break anytime soon? And why is my tummy so airy?
Went for a required medical check up. Took almost 3 hours. Then went to pops house to pick up the chicked meat for ma. Then came back only to lie down for 5 minutes and head out for lunch. Came back feeling even more like a tofu.
Anyway, started picking people about half past 2 and then there was 365. Some stuff were playing through my mind during 365. Anyway, I went out for altar call. Actually did not need anyone specifically to pray for me. Really could have been alone with God. Louisa prayed for me. Said a couple of things which made sense ie I am carrying burdens that maybe God never meant for me to carry, that I am precious in His eyes and her heart, I am wanting to move to another level, God is even challenging me about different things, etc. I wish I could have cried more. Last night I talked to dad about some issues. Teared quite a fair bit.
Dad said he loved me very much and wants the best for me. And wants me to be happy. He wants me to have the best. And he is my sounding board. Guess I feel pressured when no one but myself is pressuring me.
God, guide me. Grant me wisdom. Show me the right thing to do.
Tofu signing off to bed. Nite nite.
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